Moving Through the Darkness Into the Light

The transformational power of art

Dear Friend,

I cannot find the light without the darkness. It is simply impossible.

Recently, I was accused of being “sunshine and rainbows.” Why - you may ask - would I use a phrase like “accused of” when it comes to something so light and cheery? Well, I’ve had people say that to me in an effort to be kind and I’ve had others say it to make me feel small as though I’d recently popped out of a unicorn’s ass and been navigating the world in blissful ignorance. It used to bother me but not anymore. I can see when people are unhappy or happy within and I know when their words are born from those places. People see me and the world the way they want to, I can’t change that. In the most recent instance, I believe it was said with good intention but it got me thinking.

There have been some exceptionally dark times in my life just as there have been for all of us. We’re human and we’ve all experienced varying degrees of hurt. In our “social media” ready art-making I think many post only the best things or what they want the best things to look like and that’s fun but the reality is - as we all know - that there are some days that are going to suck. They’ll bring challenges, hurtful words, unforeseen sadness to our doorstep. When they happens, I write first to see situations with more clarity and then sometimes paint, draw, collage to give voice to things for which there are no words.

In the painting above, I was navigating some emotions that aren’t always talked about - anger and hurt. I was turning anger and hurtful words and actions I received from another into something else. I was allowing it to move through my body and my fingertips so that it could become something else. In fact, in the days after I created this, I could see so many things in it - things that felt lighter, windows where hope filtered in.

Sometimes it can seem so dark in our own heads or hearts but if we drag it all out into the open, we find pockets of light. Our entire world needs more pockets of light. Our souls need to remember that emotions are fleeting - things are always changing - but sometimes when you capture them, you can find beauty that’s all your own and universal at once. Sometimes you find hope.

One of my students was having a serious panic attack one time. I knew that art-making could help a bit to lower the anxiety level he was experiencing so we started small. I gave him one pastel and he started to make small marks on the page. After a bit, his breathing slowed and his tears stopped. He was focused and I watched him lose himself for awhile. In the end he asked for watercolors and while he painted, he talked to me about art - balancing dark and light colors. I’m not saying it’s the cure all but through art, he moved from a very dark place into a lighter one and found connection.

Within my soul, I carry sunlight, rainbows and unicorns eating cotton candy alongside untamed wild horses and dark storms with fierce lightning and lashing winds. It’s what makes us beautiful - our ability to contain all of these things within and learn from them, share them, connect through them.

Sometimes we need to be in it - whatever it is - and let it pour from our bodies through our fingers onto the page, the canvas, the street so we can see it. Then we can allow our intuition to work with it, our heart to move through it and turn it into something else - perhaps a light for others.

Just some thoughts for today….

Love,

Natasha